“Power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic. Power at its best is love implementing the demands of justice, and justice at its best is power correcting everything that stands against love.” — Martin Luther King Jr.
At its root, philanthropy is an act of love. The word ‘philanthropy’ comes from the ancient Greek: philos (loving) and anthropos (humanity). It is a love of humanity. A love of possibility and a future we may not live to see.
Martin Luther King Jnr urges us not to separate love and power. As he said in 1967: “Power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic. Power at its best is love implementing the demands of justice, and justice at its best is power correcting everything that stands against love.”
For anyone interested in social progress, Kahane agrees that we must grapple with the intersection between love and power:
“In our societies and communities and organizations, and within each of us, we usually find a ‘power camp’, which pays attention to interests and differences, and a ‘love camp’, which pays attention to connections and commonalities. The collision between these two camps — in the worlds of business, politics and social change, among others — impedes our ability to make social progress on our toughest social challenges.”
There is much imperative to understand and use power with love for the future we are endeavouring to create together.
A lesson from beneath the surface
Over the end-of-year break, I was lucky enough to go diving in beautiful Kimbe Bay, West New Britain, Papua New Guinea. Under the water, I have my ‘learner’ plates firmly fixed – awkwardly trying to be neutrally buoyant, chewing through air, changing direction with all the grace of a baby giraffe. My partner, who is a ‘dive master’, glides effortlessly through the water and helps me learn, practice and improve.
Underwater, we are guests: the environment sets the rules. The fish, turtles, rays, and sharks decide if they’ll come close. I love the reminder that I am a small speck in an enormous, ancient system. Nature is a reminder of power: where we have it, where we don’t, and how easily we can damage it, or protect it. And we can see ways that we influence it individually and collectively.
That experience sharpened my focus on power and sent me off to read about and think more deeply on the topic and how power shows up in my current and previous roles, in geopolitics, in communities, and in life in general. Power is a key piece to the puzzle of life, leadership, change and the direction it takes. It is a critical consideration and lever for change.
What is power?
Two of the world’s experts on power, Diamond and Keltner, say that at its simplest, power is the capacity to affect outcomes. It is not inherently good or bad; what matters is how it is used and to what end. “Power is our capacity to impact and influence our environment”, says Diamond.
Our power is based on a complicated combination of personal power (attributes, background, relationships, traits), positional power (roles and titles), and our and other people’s perspectives. Power is not a linear state. It changes depending on context. It can be formal (through a title or a hierarchy) and informal (entrusted from a group), earned (e.g. education, experience, expertise, knowledge and wisdom) and unearned (e.g. family socio-economic status, gender, culture etc.).
When used responsibly, power enables coordination, protection, and progress. It allows us to mobilise resources and bring people together to address “our toughest social challenges” (Kahane).
Power also has a shadow side.
The shadow side of power
At some point in our lives, power may have made us wince.
I remember the cold marble foyer of my first philanthropic foundation meeting, where I was asking for money, and feeling nauseously nervous and completely out of place. I can still feel the ‘fight’ response when my class and gender did not match societal norms expected for the role I was in.
In my workplaces, some leaders would challenge me and put me in a position where I felt like I needed to defend myself and where I came from: “Why didn’t you choose a more prestigious school?”; “We think you should get elocution lessons”; “Ladies, here’s how to introduce yourself like a man with authority”...
Titles with rank came later – Professor, CEO, Board Director, Chair. These were enabling platforms for some of the social change work I believe in. Over time, I was learning by experience, about power in relation to social status, life experiences, traits and roles.
Beyond the personal, across disciplines (leadership, philosophy, business, sociology) and sectors (businesses, governments, non-profits and philanthropy), power is often framed negatively. Machiavelli’s influence still looms large on the back of his famous work The Prince. Contemporary discussions often focus on manipulation, control, and abuse.
While it is common knowledge that ‘power can corrupt’, Keltner’s research shows that we should not think in absolutes. There are degradations in daily examples of abuses of power that we should be aware of: risk-taking, rudeness, leaving trash expecting others to pick it up, aggressive driving, eating loudly with your mouth open, irrational generosity, among others. Power can have huge costs and, if used well, huge benefits.
The shadow side of power in philanthropy is real. In 2025, in reviewing hundreds of journal articles on philanthropy and power, three authors: Dula, Paarlberg and Adeyeri found mostly negative critiques.
Personal reflections on power and philanthropy
I have experienced the positive and the shadow sides of power in philanthropy on both sides, as a grantee and as a funder.
I have rushed to decisions when certainty was expected of me and missed critical perspectives and issues. I have been seduced by getting money out the door too fast and by moving too slowly through bureaucratic processes.
I have also stepped back, listened, slowed and watched better outcomes emerge. In one community, leaders told us, “This is the first time we have been funded for our assets, not as a problem to be fixed.” That sentiment is an important part of our listening and asset-framed practices.
I have witnessed great examples of ‘new power’ (Heimans and Timms, 2014). Where open, participatory and peer-driven power usurps more traditional forms of ‘old power’.
I have experienced many moments of immense cultural power in First Nations communities and incredible rank among those with different lived experiences. Around a campfire, an Uncle and Board member of an organisation that PRF funds challenged me on our previous siloed ways of working, thinking and reporting: “That’s your problem, not mine.” He was absolutely right and a wise teacher that I was lucky enough to learn from.
Aunties with enormous cultural and relational power have told me, “We didn’t know if we’d like you”, as a rationale for initially saying they weren’t available to meet. Through building relationships and demonstrating a different approach, those same Aunties have since worked with us and helped to build bridges and strengthen collaborations across the broader community.
In the sphere of philanthropy, we have all made mistakes: pushing too much funding too fast, giving funding to large organisations who aren’t trusted by community members, reinforcing existing unhealthy power dynamics, funding what we can see rather than doing the work of finding out what else is happening, not listening to a broad enough number of voices, pushing standard processes and approaches when we’ve needed different ones, not moving fast enough to address community members' concerns.
We’ve shifted many practices, such as moving more money at speed and scale, listening to and getting funding into communities and less traditional organisations, funding First Nations-led organisations, paying what it takes, tying funding to outcomes rather than activities, changing our requirements for grant submissions, increasing transparency, finding better ways of using and blending capital, etc. It’s an evolving process. We have more to do and more to learn.
I, and we, are here for generational change. The question therefore, is when and how do we step into, share and give up power in the service of enabling children, families and communities to thrive?
What actions can for-purpose leaders take in becoming more power-wise?
As someone who works closely with many for-purpose leaders across sectors, I know I am not alone in feeling uncomfortable sitting with, stepping into, and talking about power. But there is plenty of research showing the risks and harm in not being aware of it, not acknowledging it, not learning from it, not understanding its nuances, denying it, overestimating it, overusing it, underusing it, believing it will not affect me, and not constantly working to use it appropriately.
There is much imperative for mindset shifts, conversations and actions around using power responsibly, effectively and wisely. Wisdom requires awareness, experience, knowledge and good judgment. It emphasises application and learning.
Some of the best ideas from my favourite experts and teachers on using power for the collective good, like Keltner, Diamond, Mark Yettica-Paulson, Aigner et. al., Kahane, and Hughes, recommend mindset and learning loops like:
Be power-aware:
1. Understand positional, personal and relational power - not as a hierarchy, but as an interconnected system.
2. Recognise Mark Yettica-Paulson’s “power backpack”: Others see your power differently than you do. Your “power backpack” is a reminder that others see the power you carry, differently to what you see or feel.
3. Know the shadow side of power.
Step into, step out of and share power for collective good:
1. Set and aim for a collective outcome that will make the world a better place over the longer term: next year, in a decade and/or a generation.
2. Mobilise resources to bring people together to collaboratively address problems that are bigger than any one person or organisation.
3. Hold power and love together to use power responsibility (use it, share it and let go).
Find correction points:
1. Slow down: find composure and pause before reacting.
2. Embrace low‑rank experiences: seek out places where you have less power to help build empathy, perspective and humility.
3. Look for and see the power in others.
An invitation
For for-purpose leaders, the question is not whether we will use our power, but how. My invitation this year to myself and others willing to come along is to lean into conversations and responsible actions around power with humility, warmth, courage and love.
Let’s design the checks that keep us honest and accountable, the relationships that keep us human, and the practices that make our influence worthy of trust. Embracing learning loops will allow us to make mistakes, listen, learn, and try again.
And when the water feels unfamiliar, when visibility drops, remember that we are guests in systems larger and much older than ourselves. If we do hold both power and love, perhaps we’ll surface with enough wisdom to protect what we share, and shape the future we collectively want.
Kristy Muir
February 2026
---
References
Aigner, G., Godwell, C., Martin, J., Paulson, G., Rawnsley, J., Robertson, K., Skelton, L., Varcoe, L., Yettica-Paulson, M. (2014), Lost Conversations: Finding new ways for black and white Australians to lead together, Creative Commons, Australia.
Diamond, J. (2017), Power: A Users Guide, Belly Song Press, Santa Fe, New Mexico.
Dula, L., Paarlberg, L.E. and Adeyeri, I. (2025) Philanthropic Foundations and the Exercise of Power: An Integrative Literature Review of the Many Faces of Power, Nonprofit and Voluntary Sector Quarterly, 1-26, https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/08997640251332893.
Eskesen, S.E. (2024), Reflections on power dynamics and collaborations in funds working with systemic change, Alliance Magazine, 11 June 2024,
https://www.alliancemagazine.org/blog/reflections-on-power-dynamics-and-collaborations-in-funds-working-with-systemic-change/
Ebrahimi, F. et. al. (2024), Philanthropy and Power, Supplement to SSIR sponsored by Chorus Foundation, Stanford Social Innovation Review, Winter 2024, https://ssir.org/supplement/philanthropy_and_power.
Greene, R. (2000), The 48 Laws of Power, Penguin Books, New York.
Heimans, J. & Timms, H. (2014), Understanding New Power, Harvard Business Review, December 2014, https://hbr.org/2014/12/understanding-new-power.
Hugest, C. and Barlett, S., (2025) “The Power Paradox: Why you must ‘give away’ authority to keep it!”, Decoded Realities, youtube, December 2025, https://youtu.be/sjweD7D9QcM, accessed 5 January 2026.
Kahane, A. (2009), Power and Love: A Theory and Practice of Social Change, Berrett-Koehler, California.
Keltner, D. (2016), The Power Paradox: How we Gain and Lose Influence, Penguin Press.
Keltner, D. (2016), The Power Paradox: The Promise and Peril of 21st Century Power, Talks at Google, 14 October 2016, https://youtu.be/2vJKyw6kFkw.
Machivelli, N. (1532), The Prince, 1532, accessed 27 January, 2026, https://americanliterature.com/author/niccolo-machiavelli/book/the-prince/summary.
Yettica-Paulson, M. (2022), CFI Deep Collaboration Practice, Collaboration for Impact.


.png)

